Why would God pick a @#$&-up like me?

When I take a minute to reflect on the person that I am, I can get caught up. I am a sinner. I cuss, I drink, I yell. I speak without thinking. I treat my family and friends poorly. I manipulate people into doing what I want. I struggle with all sorts of vices. I am so proud that I write in veiled language so I don't have to tell people what I'm like underneath it all. But, ... on the other hand, I am a lover. I listen, I break bread, I make time for people that I love. I think about what I'm doing and reflect on my life. I put others before myself. I am a fierce and loyal friend. I pray and hope for humility and I try to listen to the voice of God in my life. So, I'm a mixed bag - I'm broken and saved, I'm a sinner and loved. I'm like that Alanis Morisette Song, One Hand in My Pocket, (I'm high but I'm grounded, I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed). Don't believe me click here.

See, I'm just like that, I'm a mixed bag, baby. So when I say "Why would God pick a @##&-up like me?" I guess the better question, or more honest question is, "Why would God pick an occasional  @$%-up like me?" And I have a really solid answer, ... I think. And it's three parts: First, God calls us all back to him. We are made in the image of God, male and female. (Genesis 1:26-27) So - we are all called back to the source, back to our Truest image. Second, God loves losers. I'm serious and I'll show you, and the third part, God not only loves losers but qualifies them and helps them along. So I'm a bit of loser, who has had a lot of help (read: qualifying), so I'm on the right track. Let's expand on this.

So, let's start this little journey. Anybody remember a guy named Moses? I'm sure that you do, he's kind of a big deal in that whole Old Testament thing. Moses so wanted to get away from his vocation and his past that he ran away. This was after he killed someone. So he's a murderer and a run-away and he turned his back on his people. Then God steps in and says, "Perfect, I pick him to lead my people to freedom." No one ever said God had good taste. Anyway, Moses then responds, "Lord, I am a terrible speaker and don't want to do this." And God reminds him, "You're in charge, here's your brother Aaron, get out there and follow my will. ERGH!" (paraphrasing, of course) Don't believe me? It's all in Exodus, Chapter 4:10-17. So here's this guy, that's not qualified, he's basically a loser (he's at least a murderer and a run-away with low self-esteem) and God calls him to lead His people out of bondage. So God calls Moses, who is a bit of loser, gives him some help and sends him on his way.

And this my friends, is one of many examples. David is called to be the second king of the united kingdom of Israel. First, God calls him over his seven more handsome, older, and more adept brothers. David is out tending sheep and his Dad doesn't think it could possibly be David. And what does David do with that power? Once, he sees a woman, Bathsheba, taking a bath and he decides she's pretty, so he sleeps with her and has her husband killed so that he can make her one of his many wives, (2 Samuel 11). Yet, God ever-faithful, a covenant-keeper, sticks with David through this. So David was a loser who was called to power, corrupted that power and took advantage of and manipulated women, and God stuck with his calling. GOD QUALIFIES THE CALLED. And He sticks with that call, with that covenant.

So, yeah, I'm kind of a loser. I sin, I'm broken, I'm the under-dog. And it is in that very brokenness that I can give my life back to God, and know that it is enough. "My sacrifice God, is a broken spirit. A contrite and humbled heart you will not scorn." (Psalm 51: 19). My brokenness, is my best sacrifice. I am a loser, and so happy about it. So maybe that's why God would pick a loser like me. Maybe.

Shalom,
Joe